Dinner for Four

Frankly, it doesn't do the clean, folded clothes much good to pack the dirty laundry right on top of (or perhaps even intermingled with) them for the ride home from college.

Ordinarily, Davis handles his own laundry chores, but considering his return from the epic road trip (I feel like that should be in bold and all caps and perhaps even a cinemagraphic font choice) is not anticipated for more than two more weeks, I thought I might take a go at it to avoid having my house reek from the college stench that was already permeating his bedroom.

I started sorting out piles from the three large collection of linens, towels, workout clothes, and other apparel items and decided that I wasn't going to feel guilty about using more than my share of the planet's water today.

I rescued belts and caps from their watery deaths.

I put like with like and didn't pause long to consider where he got all those light blue/gray athletic socks.

I finally reached the bottom of the final basket, only revising my estimate of how many people I was doing laundry for twice--I decided it was either a family of six or the Lads (Rice's club soccer team). I found a piece of paper, folded twice, like you would put in an envelop to mail. The part that faced up had a question typed:

"3. WHAT THREE PEOPLE, REAL OR FICTIONAL, WOULD YOU HAVE OVER FOR DINNER AND WHY?"

and an answer written in ink in Davis's cramped style:

"Jon Stewart--funny
Donna Smith--good politics"

and

"My mother--she would like to meet Jon"

I was immediately gratified that the final bit didn't say "My mother--she should at least get to eat if she has to cook the meal."

Then I started to wonder what it was. I didn't really want to snoop, but . . .

I opened the paper all the way and discovered it was The Official Rice Roommate Information Sheet that Davis had filled out just about this time of year in 2006.

Other revealing questions

Will you have. . .

a car--no
a computer--yes
a vcr--no
a tv--no
a dvd player--no
a refrigerator--no
an iron--no
a phone--no
a stereo--yes

Q6 IF YOU COULD HAVE A ROMANTIC OR TORRID RELATIONSHIP WITH ANYONE, REAL OR FICTIONAL, MODERN OR HISTORIC, WITH WHOM WOULD IT BE AND WHY?

completely blank

As I looked over that piece of paper and had three questions:

1. Why they would ask an incoming freshman about his torrid dream relationship?
2. Why in the world would Davis have that ancient form at the bottom of his laundry basket (and had it been there for four years)?
3. Would I still make the cut for dinner for four (and would Jon Stewart have a good time)?